But you must bloom still in the desolate place. -Ruth pitter 
Did I ever tell you about my tumbleweed from South Dakota? I asked my friend Stephanie to pull over while we were driving because I saw a large tumbleweed rolling across a field and I ran out and grabbed it, it filled the whole back seat. In the hotel I wrapped it in my towel and snapped it in half so that it would fit in my suitcase. I made it through security at the airport. Back at home I used wood glue to put the stem back together and placed it on top of my TV. I guess I like them because they were alive once, growing, had color, maybe flowers even and now they are finished that stage but they have not given up, instead they are still moving. They still have beauty, just a different kind of beauty. Chloe was behind me brushing my hair and putting barrettes in, I was going over notes and things that I needed to do that day, and journaling. My desk in the study is up against a window that looks out to the back yard, and when I looked up I saw what looked like a tumbleweed blowing across the lawn, a football size ball of tan. It looked so poetic to me, usually in our yard it is a leaf here or there, but here was a dried bouquet of flowers tumbling over itself across the white snow. 
*My South Dakota tumble weed 
Steve came home from a very long deacons meeting at church and said "Come on lets go somewhere" so we spent an hour trying to decide where to go, it was so sunny but bitter cold. We ended up driving for an hour to go to Barnes and Nobles bookstore. Steve and I had a huge stack of books to flip through while the kids played in the kids section. I am trying SOOOOOO hard to keep my schedule free free free and just be home alone every day with the kids because when May starts the wedding season will be in full swing for me. Right now I am free to paint and sew and play in other art forms with the kids that I do not have time to do during wedding season. Instead of mostly photography books this time it was all sewing crafty stuff, most of the notes I scribbled were ideas of things to make. A few days ago the kids and I sat on the couch and had a meeting. We all voted on what I should make for them and for the house. I was thinking how nice it is that Jeff still loves my homemade toys and that all three kids are not too old to be young still. The best ideas I jotted down came the book shown above Zakka sewing, there were so many Japanese traditional (with a modern twist) projects. The Gentle art of Domesticity was just as my friend Shanda described, I could not read any of it, I know I would rather own it (someday). 
The days have been so difficult lately, we had to pay over $500 to get work done on the van in order to get it inspected, we had a nasty virus on our computer, just so many other things. Life is changing for us, but our relationship is a constant, a touchstone for both of us. 
"O Love ever burning and never extinguished..my God, set me ablaze! You command us to be continent (contained); give what You command, and command what You will." (Augustine pg240)
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