The older kids are outside playing in the snow. I can hear muffled yelling and laughing coming through my study window.

Seg is sleeping.

Adele is filling the air.

I am sitting here with an apron around my waist and a big winter coat on.

Steve made us pancakes for breakfast, it is the perfect sort of day where we are snowed in with no plans.

I have been working on a Christmas post (I know a month later). It is almost ready I have just one more photo to take (One of Eti holding up his stocking).   In the meantime a gift came in the mail for Seg. It is a little sweater from my friend Amanda! I followed Seg around the house trying to get a picture to show Amanda how she looks in it.

Tsega is VERY busy now, she likes to take my Tupperware and set it all up by the back door, she likes climbing the stairs as fast as she can before anyone can catch her, she likes finding bits of paper and throwing it away as if it is a very important job,  she likes pushing her baby dolls all over the downstairs in her little doll stroller, and she likes asking her brothers to carry her around on their shoulders, just to name a few.  So trying to get a picture is not so easy.

If I could I would dress her only in homemade all the time! Homemade and vintage. Serioulsy though how cute is this sweater?

I have a little shadow

We are out of light bulbs.

The kitchen lights have blown.

I went to the store to get light bulbs.

I bought dish soap, bananas, milk, smoked ham bones for soup.  I drove home, and realized I had not bought light bulbs.

Etienne very generously lit a bunch of candles for me while I made dinner to provide some light (excess amount of matches used).

Okay, hold that thought I am skipping to a new one, but I will come back to my dark kitchen and make it all relate.

I love LOVE how Tsega follows me around everywhere.  If she is not in the baby carrier, or on my hip, she is right at my heels. Between her and the dog I have this wonderful little fan club.

If I have to go in a room and shut the door when I come out they are both sitting right outside the door waiting for me. If I go outside her little face is up against the glass of the door and she dances and screeches with joy when I return as if I was gone hours when it was only a minute.

Our kitchen has an island and sometimes when I am cooking I will go back and forth, around and around the island from the stove to the fridge to the pantry, and she is right there, usually holding toys in her hands up close to her chest toddling behind me.

Last night I could hear the pit pat of her following me. The dining room light was on, but of course the kitchen was dark and when I turned I could see her little shadow coming around to find me. Oh my heart.

Everything takes me three times as long to finish now because it is so much more fun to stop the world and sit on the floor and play with her.

The kids say all the time "What was our life like before there was a Tsega?!"

We love loving her.

Marissa Ann

I have less than ten minutes to put this post up, Steve promised me a NetFlix date if I get done by 9:30 :)

We spent most of the day in the waiting room and it was SO worth it to be there when my brother walked in the room and said "It's a girl!"

Marissa Ann is beautiful!!

 My sister Janet and I walking the halls with our babies.

Boy or a girl?

We are all so excited here! My brother Justin is about to become a dad for the first time! As soon as Tsega wakes up from her nap we are heading to the hospital.

Martha and Justin do not know what they are having yet, isn't that exciting?! I would never be able to wait to find out! Us sisters are so close to Martha.

Julie and Janet are on the way to hospital right now...I love being part of a big family!

I cannot wait to fall in love with her little one!

12:16 12/5/10

Today held so much emotion for me.

 I knew I would be aware of the date January 5th .

 It is the date we got the call and discovered who our little baby was.

It does not seem like a year ago that we all met at the supermarket around the corner from my parent's house.  My Mom and Dad had six kids and love to hear that their children are having more babies.  Each time we tell Mom one of us is expecting she cries with joy.  You can imagine the happy expectation we had since 2008 waiting to see who her newest granddaughter would be!  We all wanted to surprise her. Most of my siblings were there, we walking together to Mom and Dad's and I remember when Mom pulled Tsega's picture out of the gift bag I cried and cried and cried because I loved Tsega so much already. To me it felt exactly like giving birth to a child but not being able to hold her or see her.

I did not get much done today I spent most if my time looking at my baby.  It comes in waves "Wow, the wait is over, she is really here!"

I sewed her a little jacket from this pattern  as a gift to her in honor of the day. I have always dreamed of sewing clothes for my girls.  I finally made a dress for Coco and her doll (She is the oldest girl and I wanted to make sure she knew I have not forgotten her) and now it was time for me to make Seg something so I chose today to finish it.

"I find that including so much handmade in our family life helps us to lead simpler, more mindful days." Amanda Soule

There is no rocking chair in my room, there is no room for one. At Seg's nap time I stretch out on the bed and she lays on my chest.  I sing to her and talk softly in Amharic so that we both will not forget, and then her breathing slows. She sucks her two middle fingers and has her other hand under her head. I can feel her curly hair on my cheek. Every single time she falls asleep it feels like a gift.

At other times during the day, when I am finished changing her, I let her stand up on the changing table and jump into my arms.  She doesn't really jump it is more like free falling. Eti saw it the other day and said "Wow, Mom she really trusts you!".  Yes, I think that as well, but It is when she falls asleep on my chest that I feel she trusts me the most. Here is what really gets me.  When we are done with the Amharic I whisper "I love you" and every single time, she lifts her head,  pats my chest, and says almost in a whisper "Mama" and I say "Yes i'm your Mama" and she coos and wiggles in closer and then falls asleep.

That to me is trust.

That is why long after she is asleep I am still laying there in the dark feeling her little weight on my chest and thanking God over and over again for my children. 

I did not know, I just did not know she was going to trust me and see me as her Mom.  We would have loved her just the same if she couldn't or wouldn't accept us.  But I am deeply deeply grateful, on this day, the day we found out about HER, that she does open her little heart to me.